I can do all things...

Its amazing how things can change... How things you once thought were impossible, no seem like no big deal... how things that use to strike fear, pain, anger, sorrow, now can actually rise little emotion, or positive emotions...
I came across a recollection on my past few runs. I use to run cross country. In high school our races were 5K or 3.1 Miles. Quite a distance for your average runner. Once or twice a week, we would do long training runs. Usually 45 minutes to an hour. In those runs we would try to get about 7-8 miles in. We would take our time, run at a comfortable pace for the entire time. I was not always fond of those runs. They were boring, long, and there was no real reason for any person to run that far. I remember on one Saturday we were running at Zorinsky and we met two runners who were running three laps around the lake... over 22 miles. That seemed impossible!
Fast forward a few years. In the spring of 2005, I restarted my running career. I signed up for a half marathon. My training runs went from 3-4 miles to 8-10. A number that was once to huge and boring, now was a weekly occurrence. Then a year and a half after that, I was signed up for a marathon. My 8-10 miles came a few times a week, I even got into running 15 miles on Saturdays. Last night, I finished an 18.5 mile run, and could still jog afterwards.
Just a few years ago, running immense distances was terrifying, boring, something that I had no desire to do... now, a run isn't a run unless its a long one.
How things change. I remember being fearful of the idea of the Waters Edge. Now, I volunteer there, I have preached there a few times (that's probably scarier for the congregation), and its a place that brings great joy.
I hated reading just a few years ago, hated spending time doing that, when there was so much else to be done. Now, I love reading. It excites me, it makes me think.
Take time to think about things in your life that has changed. What use to seem dreadful, that now may bring joy? Kids? Marriage? Job? Growing up?
Its amazing the things we can accomplish when we put our minds to it... and of course, with a little help from God :)

because it reflects the sun...

Normally i like to begin with a scriptural reference to guide my blog, but all i have is a song lyric. I am nearly positive that it comes from scripture, but my tired mind and impatience is inhibiting my ability to find it...
Anyway, the song comes from the Paul Coleman Trio. A great band, seen them in concert twice, amazing both times. Unfortunately they broke up.
But that's neither here nor their. One of their songs, which i actually don't care for much, shows the desire to be like the moon.
I want to be the moon, it reflects the sun; don't want to be the stars and shine on everyone.
The moons purpose at night is to illuminate the sky by reflecting the light from the sun.
So Tuesday night, tonight, I was running around Zorinsky lake. I felt pretty good after an 8.65 mile run Sunday, skipped Monday, and set off to do about 10 miles or so. I pulled into the lake around 7:45. I have met a friend here many a time at 7:30, but never had it been that dark. It past the sunset as I set off. Zorinsky is very poorly lit. Except for the parking lots, the only real light you ever have is the moon.
Luckily for me, it was shining brighter than i have seen in a while. Just by reflecting the light of the sun, i could see the path during my entire run. It was amazing. I have never had such a peaceful jaunt. I started to think of that song. The importance of reflecting God's light and what not... pretty cheesy connection i know...
As I rounded mile number nine or so, i biker was riding towards me. Not an uncommon thing on a trail... yet he had a headlight on his bike. His own light blinded me. It made it so i could not see even a foot in front of me. Think about driving on a dark highway... if the person driving towards you, has their brights on, you cannot see much else...
As they passed, i slowly regained vision, focusing on the reflected light from the moon. Back to peace, back to safety, back to comfort.
So often I like to be the problem solver, the person you can trust, the person who will bring joy to situations and what not. Not because I want to be the best or because it think I am better than others, I just like to bring a light into people's eyes.
Is my light more like that annoying bikers? or is it actually God's light reflecting through me? As I look back, very often it is not God, it is me. I want to be a star and shine my light on everyone. God's light is perfect, it is much bigger and better than mine...
Who's light are you shining?
Lets focus on being like the moon, and not the stars... God is a better light, than all of us put together...
PS... i actually ran about 14.5 miles tonight... go me. more than i have run since January when i was running my marathon! Hope to keep it up!

Where I find my heaven...

Have you just ever had one of those days?
Man, today was one of those. Nothing seemed to go well. I was in a meeting for half of the day, I missed my plan time, which means, the time I normally spend making adjustments in class, grade, relax and prepare was gone. So I came back in the middle of my class... and nothing went well. The only good part was that I was able to get a run in with my x-country kiddos. But still now, I sit in my room with so much to do, I don't even want to start. Do you ever feel that way?
See this was supposed to end with our new youth director starting. Chad officially took the reigns of my job on Sunday. So I should have more time! Yet, it seems, there is even less.
Plus, I am growing cynical... I see the negatives in a lot of things. I find things to complain about. I am not normally this way, but for some reason, I have just been in that funk for a few days now.
Maybe its the loss of a job I really loved. Yeah, it was a lot of work, and yeah, I will be around just as much... but for some reason I feel empty, I feel alone, I feel distant...
All I seem to be hearing recently is bad news... failing health from close friends and their family... death of friends loved ones... surgery needed... other bad incidences...
Maybe, it takes me back to when I lost my dad last year. Things just seem to be not going well... they are not terrible, but you know... just not good.
Many of us can relate... we all go through parts of our life where things just kinda stink. Work is bothering you, kids demand every ounce of energy, friends and family offer attempts for solace, but everything seems to fall short....
I was listening to iTunes on my computer after practice... this song came on from the movie Dumb and Dumber... [thinking of the movie makes me smile :)]. The song plays as the guys travel to Aspen on the motor scooter. Its a song called Where I find my heaven by the Gigolo Aunts... yeah, weird I know...
The song has the underlying story that a guy is seeking his heaven, or his peace, through his daily life... the quiet desk lamp before a busy day, whispers and random silliness... all places where he find his peace, his Heaven.
It got me thinking, where is my Heaven? Where do I go for peace? Where do I go when the burden of life seems too much?
It took me over to another song of possibly my favorite band, Big Daddy Weave (in fact, one of their songs is the title of my blog site "Audience of One"). The song quotes a couple verses in Matthew 11: 28-30
28"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
(Weird God sighting... We are supposed to read Matthew 11, if you are following Craig's one chapter a day reading plan! Holy Cow! God is awesome :))
Where is your heaven? Your true heaven should be laying your burdens at the alter. Yeah, spending time with family and friends is a short cure... I love hanging with my friends, in fact i am going to a concert with them tonight, and I love spending time with my mom and my family, but my issues are always waiting for me when i get back. The only way to find my true peace, my true heaven, is in the grace of God, and through his son, Jesus.
That's Where I find MY heaven... where do you find yours?
May blessings come upon your life and through your struggles. God is good, and God Loves You.

Blessed is She

Matthew 5: 1-10 (NIV)
1Now when he saw the crowds, he went up on a mountainside and sat down. His disciples came to him, 2and he began to teach them saying:
3"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
4Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.
5Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.
6Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.
7Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.
8Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.
9Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God.
10Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.


Fridays are usually very joyfilled for teachers. Usually lighter material for me, kids are pretty well behaved, and infact today I had a quiz, so it was quiter and easier than normal. Today was a good day, a refreshing day, a peaceful day. Except for one part.
We had a meeting with a parent today. I have had this parent now three times (well, three of her kids in a row). The first year was rough. Last year was alright. This year, I didn't know what to expect. We had a discussion earlier in the year about her son's struggles. You see, her son has extremely poor reading and comprehension abilities, because of poor choices that his birth mother made. This mother, was a foster mom. A foster mom of nine actually. All kids with varied needs. Some with high abilities, some with poor abilities, some who just need a safer and more stable environment.
In this meeting, we discussed the best possible options for her son. He was struggling, and she feared that he was not learning anything. She was also worried that frustration and bad behavior would come due to his growing struggles. She did not attack us, she wanted our input on how he was doing. Throughout the meeting I focused on her as she interated with my peers in the meeting. Several times she was near tears. She was so focused on how to help this child, doing whatever she could to teach, to ensure success. Her emotion nearly brought me to tears a few times.
Nothing truly came out of the meeting, except for a new understanding and some learning on my part. I have a greater respect for this woman. The time and effort she has devoted to her kids is nothing short of amazing. The conflicts we had in previous years were not out of anger at the teachers, but a drive to help her kids be as successful in our classes as they could be. She wants the best for her kiddos.
I wish all parents had that drive. Its something my parents had too, and I am forever grateful for it. I cannot think but how lucky those nine children are to have an advocate like she has.
She may not know it, but she models a biblical parenthood. An unconditional love that crosses all gaps.
I hope I remember her actions and the actions of my parents when I am with my future children, or my nieces or nephews, or even when I am at school.
Do I model biblical values? Do you? We should.
Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.
Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.
Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.
Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.
Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.
Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God.

Today... As long as its still Today...

Hebrews 3: 12-13 "See to it, brothers, that none of you has a sinful, unbelieving heart that turns away from the living God. But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin's deceitfulness."(NIV)

Sorry for the sporadic postings... no excuses. I hope to make more regular postings from here on out.

This morning at Bible study, Stacy and I came across this verse. Its a passage in Hebrews that has never stuck out to me before... but today it hit me a little stonger than normal.
Its the idea of today. Encourage one another daily, as long as its called Today, so that none of you... I am going to use this a little out of context.
Daily, so that Today... doesn't make a lot of sense even as I look at it now.
I will refer back to a few days ago. I was sitting at Cross Country practice (ok, i was actually standing). It was a more difficult one, trying to build leg strength and cardio so that running will get easier, and the kiddos will continue to get better. There was a lot of whining and moaning and more than enough walking to make the old folks at the malls jealous.
The other coach and I had some growing frustrations. Afterwards we talked to the kids about getting better each day. That in order to get better at running, and make it easier, you have to actually try it. And after each day, it will get easier, you will be more comfortable and so on. It takes one day at a time...
Fast forward.
There have been things in my life that I struggle with lately. With the start of school, I've been busy, and I have neglected running, and my quiet devotional time. I have all these plans of how I am going to get better. That by next week, my long runs will be 15 miles, I will be reading so many chapters a day and I will spend time in deep prayer everyday...
Weeks later, and guess what, its not true.
See, there is a problem... the more I focus on the future... the less I am taking things as they are today. The same advice I gave my runners. What i need to do instead is focus on the here and now. I dont need to worry about my long runs in the week. Or doing a few strait weeks of my devo's. What i need to focus on is getting better today. If I focus on the todays... those weeks will fall into place.
May God focus your todays, that your tomorrows will wait for tomorrow.

Invisible Children

Psalm 82: 2-4:
2 "How long will you defend the unjust and show partiality to the wicked?
3 Defend the cause of the weak and fatherless; maintain the rights of the poor and oppressed.
4 Rescue the weak and needy; deliver them from the hand of the wicked. "

Two Sundays ago, our youth group and church were blessed with wonderful presentation by a former member of the group, Danielle Naven. She and a friend Madyson Lenihan (probably misspelled that name...) had gotten involved with program called Invisible Children. It is based on a video that three guys made as they traveled to Sudan (and eventually Uganda) with the desire to video tape the tragic war in North Central (well, Eastern-North-Central Africa). They were led to Northern Uganda. What they found was a terrible scene of thousands of homeless children, living in hiding from the rebel army (LRA- Lord's Resistance Army). The leader would kidnap children and train them to be child soldiers.
You can check out more information at invisiblechildren.com
The atrocities that occur in that country are far worse than I have seen in my life, and besides those who witnessed the Holocaust, I am sure the same would be true. Hundreds of thousands of men, women and children have lost their lives in the genocide that is going in in Sudan and Uganda.
How can we as a civilized nation sit idly by as this occurs. Many of us probably have not heard, or do not know the extent of the crisis that is going on. Why have we as a nation, as a people gone silent for so long. How can the most tragic event of our times gone unknown to the majority of the population?
I don't say this as an accusation. I have the same problem. It is far away, it doesn't affect me, and what can I do anyway? I have said all those things.
But, what if it was us? What if we weren't lucky enough to be born in this country, in our city and neighborhood? What if you had to sleep in a bus station for fear that you would be kidnapped and trained to be a child soldier? What if?
Yeah, its a pretty big what if... but we have become accustomed to the mentality that if it doesn't affect us or involve us, then who cares? Its not just a national thing, or a racial thing, or a economic thing, its a personal thing. We as a people, do not seek out for the welfare of others. We don't. I see it every day between school and church. Yeah, once a month I will get down and dirty, but we do it for the good feeling.
I am just as guilty. Yeah, you may get mad at me for saying this, maybe you do help others... but, is it a lifestyle of yours? Or just once a week, or maybe just to get the good name, or maybe it helps you in other ways.
What can we do as a people to improve the lives of others? I must challenge you, me and us to this. It cannot be a school thing, it cannot be a church thing, it cannot be a government thing. It has to start with you. It has to start with me. Global change, from our neighborhoods, to the cities in Africa, to all across the world, must start with in us. That's the only way anything will ever change.
Its an uphill battle, but hey, its one with an eternal reward. May God bless your journey and whatever that entails.

Trip of a Lifetime??? With some biblical inspiration...

Five months of planning could not have prepared us for what would come...

Greetings! Sorry for the delay since my last post... I was out of town on a trip that I will soon explain.

Four men, on a sports trip... grunt grunt grunt...

Our plan: Four baseball parks, amusement park, and two historical sites all in one week's time.

Saturday, July 28th, roughly Nine AM, we depart. We are headed for our first game at Busch Stadium in St. Louis. Go Cards! Drive down was pretty uneventful... except we imposed a rule that any time there was a gaseous exodus, the window needed to be rolled down... for everyone's safety (Gross you say? hey, we are men!)

The real events of the day happened after the trip (Cards won by the way, 5-2 I think...).

It was my turn to drive, sadly enough because I has all of 3 hours of sleep the night before... and it was 9:30 pm and I had about three hours of driving ahead of me. Our next game was in Cincinnati the next day... a day game. We had roughly 15 hours to drive 5 and a half hours. But o wait, time zone change... so take an hour off of our time. Our goal was to drive three hours that night, check into a hotel, and then drive two more in the morning. That was the plan. So back to the car. We got in the car at 9:30, we were a mile away from the interstate... no sweat... well I guess 40,000 other people must have been trying to get on the same interstate on ramp, because it took over an hour to make it a mile (ave. speed: less than a mile an hour for you math whizzes out there!) So, now we are cruising. Heading through Illinois, now Indiana. We wanted to crash around Indianapolis, because it was roughly half way. 1:30 rolls around, with two guys snoring in the back seat, I figure it is time to find a hotel. We are close to Indianapolis so we made it halfway. We stop at an exit that has four or five hotels. Figure we'd find a room... yeah, sure didn't. Four hotels checked, zero rooms. We head back on the interstate... next exit, three more hotels... seven hotels total, zero rooms... Then Eric, one of the guys on the trip, realizes... hey, isn't the brickyard 400 this weekend? I am not a big NASCAR fan, but I know there are two really big races a year. Indianapolis 500 and the Brickyard. Both by chance are in Indianapolis... and where are we... yup, Indianapolis...

We ended up checking about 12 hotels... zero rooms. We decide to drive all the way to Cinci. As we approach Cinci we begin checking hotels again... we are miles away from the race... so we figure we'd be safe. Nope... no rooms. On a hunch, I ask, is it because of the race? "Yeah," was the response "and the Jazz Festival". Oh, so not only do we have one of the biggest NASCAR races against us, but there's a jazz festival... great... So we slept, in a car, in a Home Depot/Walmart parking lot. We arrived at about 6 as the sun was rising... I didn't sleep at all. I quickly had to get out of the car, because I cannot sit still to save my life... And I think the best thing for me to do is get some coffee and to collect all the shopping carts that are all over the lot... well, I woke up two of the other guys who were actually able to sleep for 20 minutes... whoops!

We brushed our teeth in the parking lot, with bottled flavored water as our rinse (which was disgusting...), and went to a Burger King for breakfast. We stayed there about two hours, killing time until we could go to the game. Two of the guys tried to sleep, I brought in a book and my laptop, JR tried to read also. We go to the game... gross, smelly, wearing the same clothes as the day before... and great, it was 95 degrees in Cinci. Cubs win, 6-1. I wish I could say that the rest of the trip was as exciting... but nothing tops the first 30 hours of the trip.

Monday we went to Ceder Point, a huge roller coaster park. Great rides, horrible lines... even on a Monday. Cleveland hosted the Texas Rangers. Cleveland won... don't remember the score though. Our hotel was only two blocks away from the field. Downtown Cleveland was awesome. Great restaurants, great scenery. Off to Pittsburgh. Nicest stadium. Great backdrop of downtown. Pirates won 15-1, over the Cards. Our hotel room, though, we ran into another problem. See, we booked all the hotels ahead of time (except for the first, obviously, and the last, because we didn't know where we would be on the road). We booked a hotel with two double beds, but they only had king sized rooms. Four guys do not fit well on a king sized bed, so I volunteered to sleep on a recliner... that was uncomfortable, so I ended up on the floor.
The next morning we start our journey home... with two stops on the way, Canton, OH, home of the NFL Hall of Fame, and Dyersville, IA, home of the Field of Dreams. Pittsburgh to Canton was a beautiful country drive through the Appalachian mountains. Unfortunately there was only a country highway, and that one seemed to drop to 25 mph every ten miles when we entered another town...
We arrived in East Canton (yeah, there is actually and East Canton) and that led us to Canton. No sweat right? Follow the signs, we will be there in no time. Well, there were no signs... We had no idea what highway to take, what exit... nothing. Finally, we figure it out and we arrive... just in time to see hundreds of kids, from a YMCA camp. The Hall of Fame isn't very big, so when we see 500 kids walk in, we knew it would be a long day.
The rest of the way was pretty easy. Found hotel, found the Field of Dreams, and despite my attempt to go the wrong way, and to get into an accident, we made it home safely on Friday afternoon. Praise God!
Our story was pretty hilarious... lots of fun memories. Maybe not for you, but for us. And we learned something from it. You see, we were going on our plans that things will just work out for the best of us. We relied on our own thoughts and desires instead of maybe finding a better way (better maps. better planning of the first night) and we ended up in some pretty uncomfortable situations.
It reminds me of many biblical figures. Jonah, Judas, the Israelites countless times, all had a higher calling to live with. They all had great plans set before them. Unfortunately, they wanted no part in God's plans. They wanted to live life their way. Well, one ended up in a whale, another hanged himself (yeah, its hanged, not hung) and the others found themselves in captivity several times. Our plans don't seem to work all that well. But the great news is that God had better plans. In the book of Jeremiah God declares His plans for us:
Jeremiah 29: 11-14: "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you," declares the LORD, "and will bring you back from captivity. I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you," declares the LORD, "and will bring you back to the place from which I carried you into exile." (NIV)
If you seek him with all your heart, he will be found by you, and he will deliver you from your captivity. Think about it. How is your captivity? Maybe some higher plans are a better choice.